Quarantine’s quite a fun thing, isn’t it? Lots of drama, lots of boredom, lots of lessons and lots of arguments. So, how would certain characters feel if they were forced into 2020 Lockdown with each other? Fun scripts for anyone to preform (at least one adult joke is made in this one). If anybody has any ideas for characters combinations, send them my way.
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We enter onto a plain room. It has white walls. Thereās an ugly, old brown couch in the centre with a colourful knitted throw thrown over it. Thereās a fireplace to the side of the couch, lit and a pile of ash at the bottom of it as itās been going a long time. In front of the fireplace thereās an old knitted rug, in similar colours to the throw. There are a few pictures of cats hung on the wall and one picture of a scarecrow in a field next to another cat. Dorothy is sat on the couch, flipping through an old book. Alice is sat on the rug near the fireplace, her shirt partly down as sheās too hot in her dress. Sheās hugging her knees to her chest, rocking back and forth and fanning herself.
Alice: Can we go out yet?
Dorothy: Nope.
Alice: (brief pause) What about now?
Dorothy: Still nope.
Alice: Surely it must be over now?
Dorothy: Not according to the news. We just have to be patient.
Alice: I donāt like being patient (kicks the floor with her heel).
Dorothy: Well, unless you want to be a patient, you have to be patient.
Thereās a minute silence as Alice rolls around on the floor, doing many different silly poses to try and get comfortable. Dorothy continues to flip through her book and doesnāt look up.
Alice: How are you so good at this?
Dorothy: Iāve had to sit inside for days when tornado season comes to my Aunty Emās farm.
Alice: (shuffling again) Lucky.
Dorothy: Not really. Why donāt you read a book, Alice?
Alice: Donāt like books.
Dorothy: Maybe paint a picture then?
Alice: (gestures to the room) Iāve already done that. Do you not see all the cats?
Dorothy: (looks up from book) Oh, yeah. Theyāre⦠nice.
Alice: You didnāt even notice them.
Dorothy: No, I did.
Alice: Well, you didnāt say anything about them.
Dorothy: I was busy, reading.
Alice: Youāre always reading. Canāt you play with me instead?
Dorothy: Canāt you do your homework for class on Monday?
Alice: Already done it. What about you?
Dorothy: Iāll do it later. After Iāve finished my book.
Alice: Ugh, I shouldāve just stayed with my sister. Either way Iād just get someone reading a book and ignoring me.
Dorothy: Take a nap. Thatās what I do when Iām bored.
Alice: Tried that. Not one sign of a White Rabbit.
Dorothy: Honestly, I think thatās kind of a good thing to hear. I havenāt seen a sign of Oz lately either.
Alice: Theyāre probably all stuck in quarantine too. Ugh, they must be so bored.
Dorothy: Well, they do say it can get anywhere. I wouldnāt want to get the Good Witch ill. I donāt think sheād ever forgive me.
Alice: Are you ready to play yet?
Dorothy: No, Alice. Let me finish my book.
Alice: Please.
Dorothy: No.
Alice: Come on, you know you want to.
Dorothy: Iām busy.
Alice: Can we at least turn the fireplace off? Itās boiling.
Dorothy: No. It took me ages to light that fire. It stays on. A bookās always better with a roaring fireplace going on in the background.
Alice: Who told you that? The scarecrow or the tin-man? (snickers)
Dorothy: Donāt be silly. The scarecrow canāt go near fire. And the tin-manās too scared that heāll set his forest on fire.
Alice: All your friends are kind of lame then?
Dorothy: Oh, yes, what about your friends? The Mad Hatter whoās high on caffeine all the time or the caterpillar whoās high on something else entirely? Doesnāt everyone in Wonderland pretty much just want to kill you?
Alice: At least itās interesting there. Never a dull day. Unlike here.
Dorothy: Well, then, next time this happens you can go and stay with someone else. Iāll be quite fine on my own.
Alice: Oh, please. You like the attention too much to be all alone.
Dorothy: How dare you. Get out.
Alice: I canāt go out, remember?
Dorothy: Then, go to another room.
Alice: Fine. Iāll go play with the yellow bricks in the garden (makes to leave).
Dorothy: Itās raining outside, remember?
Alice: Ugh. I hate this stupid house.
Dorothy: Hey, at least you werenāt swept up in a tornado.
Alice: Oh, please, Dorothy. Everyone knows it was all a dream.
Dorothy: It was real. Iāve got bruises to prove it.
Alice: If you had bruises to prove it, why would they still be there? Liar.
Dorothy: Call me liar again and Iāllā¦
Alice: Youāll what? Read me to death?
Dorothy: (throws her book at Alice, Alice dodges) Get out!
Alice: Fine. I donāt want to see your stupid face anymore anyway.
Dorothy: I donāt want to see yours either (goes to pick up her book). Itās corn on the cob for dinner tonight.
Alice: Ugh, again?
Dorothy: If you want to do the shopping, why donāt you go next time?
Alice: I donāt want to.
Dorothy: Then, weāre eating corn on the cob.
Alice: Fine.
Dorothy: Fine.
Alice storms out and Dorothy brushes down her book. She wanders back to the couch and fans herself.
Wow, geez, itās hot in here.
She continues reading.